lolsotrue: #856

Trying to understand some people is like trying to pick up a turd by the clean side.

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lolsotrue: #851

There's very little advice in men's magazines. That's because men think, 'I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked.'

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lolsotrue: #847

Girls are like superheroes. Who else could bleed for five days and not die?

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lolsotrue: #836

Girls are like Blackberrys, they only work when you rub one little button. Men are like iPhones, one touch anywhere and they respond.

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lolsotrue: #835

Some people just need a pat, on the head, with a hammer.

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lolsotrue: #796

The older you get, the harder it is to get around. There are more and more people you are trying to avoid!

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