They say money can't buy you happiness, but being broke buys you nothing.







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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me thrice, you're probably really hot.







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Everything enjoyable makes you fat, an addict or broke.







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I'm no cactus expert, but I know a prick when I see one.







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It's impossible to say, 'I wasn't talking to you' politely.







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The awkward moment when you die and your life flashes before you and all you see is the Internet.







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