'You wore that before.' 'Yeah, that's because it's my shirt and I have a washing machine.'

52      0
That one girl everyone likes but you hate because you know deep down she is evil.

34      0
The closest I've come to murder is holding my Oreos under the milk until the bubbles stop.

61      0
If I die in my sleep I can actually say I died doing what I love.

51      0
Capitalization is the difference between 'helping your Uncle Jack off a horse' and 'helping your uncle jack off a horse'.

32      0
How do parents expect good grades when I push on pull doors?

44      0