Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. 
They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.







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There are three sides to any argument: Your side, My side and The right side.







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My relationship is so perfect, and my boyfriend does this cute thing where he doesn't exist .







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They say you are what you eat but I don't remember eating a sexy beast this morning.







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When a man says 'ladies first' it really means, 'you go while I stare at your ass'.







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I'd much rather be a woman than a man. Women can cry, wear cute clothes, and are the first to be rescued off from sinking ships.







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