Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.







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WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.







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When I text you a whole paragraph and you text me back 40 minutes later saying 'K'. Are you asking to be punched?







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'Okay, this is important. How do we decide?'
Rock, Paper, Scissors!







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The perfect lover is one who turns into pizza at 4am.







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A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life, to be thankful for a good one.







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