I'll do pretty much anything if I know it's guaranteed to annoy someone.

3      0
When I was a kid... No wait, I still do that.

6      0
Nicknames are way more fun when people don't know they have them.

12      0
I'm going back to sleep. I refuse to give up on my dreams that easily.

14      0
If people are talking behind your back, then just fart.

12      0
Maybe she's born with it, maybe it's an Instagram filter.

9      0