My first instinct when I see an animal is to say 'hello'. My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.

56      0
I'm not judgmental. I just have excellent assessment skills.

35      0
Have you ever listened to somebody speak and wonder who ties their shoelaces for them?

29      0
I was going to give you a nasty look, but I see you already have one.

38      0
How nice would it be if the more you looked at hot people, the hotter you get.

30      0
Nothing is as disappointing as reheated fries.

35      2